Look at that.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Introducing...
... the all-new all-fantastic Blood SBowl All Time Hall of Fame! Now the league can forever remember the standout performances of the fastest runners, sharpest passers, most brutal murderers, and of course the coaches who drive them to these feats of madness. Don't see your name up there as much as you would like? Well, play better, you baddie. If Aaron can top the leaderboards, anyone can.
Seriously.
Look at that.
Look at that.
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Announcing Blood SBowl Season 3!
The ancient fields lay dry and bloodless, the stands creak emptily in the howling winds, and the shadow of an iron-fisted tyrant looms over the kingdom. One among you will drive the villain SB from his throne... but who?
We'll find out soon, because the third season of the Blood SBowl league will begin some time during the evening on TUESDAY, MAY 14TH! As always, the league will have a single-round-robin regular season followed by a cut to a top 4 single-elimination playoff. The expected match frequency is one per week, rolling over early if all games are completed (and, of course, exceptions can be made for extenuating circumstances). Any team will be accepted, so put on your gear, practice your murdering skills on some people that you don't care about, and maybe teach your players how to handle the ball.
We'll see you on the pitch!
We'll find out soon, because the third season of the Blood SBowl league will begin some time during the evening on TUESDAY, MAY 14TH! As always, the league will have a single-round-robin regular season followed by a cut to a top 4 single-elimination playoff. The expected match frequency is one per week, rolling over early if all games are completed (and, of course, exceptions can be made for extenuating circumstances). Any team will be accepted, so put on your gear, practice your murdering skills on some people that you don't care about, and maybe teach your players how to handle the ball.
We'll see you on the pitch!
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Season 2 Final Standings
After a series of playoffs that left every team battered and bruised followed by a savage, bloody final that included a turn 1 death, 5 KOs, an additional 8 casualties, and FOUR failed teammate throws, the Tromaville Terribads have managed to claw through the playoffs to claim victory for Season 2!
Congratulations to all involved, especially newcomer Mojo for posting the best overall record despite having only played like three games of Blood Bowl before starting the league. News on league awards and the beginning of Season 3 soon to come!
Preserved for posterity:
Playoff final standings:
Regular season final standings:
Congratulations to all involved, especially newcomer Mojo for posting the best overall record despite having only played like three games of Blood Bowl before starting the league. News on league awards and the beginning of Season 3 soon to come!
Preserved for posterity:
| Position | Player | Team | TV |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1st | SB | Tromaville Terribads (Underworld) | 1610 |
| 2nd | Mojo | WYLA (Undead) | 1470 |
| 3rd | Alise | Deez Hawks (Wood Elves) | 770 |
| 3rd | Sean | Krenlash's Team (Vampires) | 1340 |
Regular season final standings:
| Player | Team | TV | W-L-D |
|---|---|---|---|
| Mojo | WYLA (Undead) | 1630 | 6-1-2 |
| Sean | Krenlash's Team (Vampires) | 1510 | 6-2-1 |
| SB | Tromaville Terribads (Underworld) | 1670 | 5-1-3 |
| Alise | Deez Hawks (Wood Elves) | 1000 | 4-4-1 |
| Aaron | Soul Silver (Lizardmen) | 1480 | 4-4-1 |
| Will | The Broman Empire (Norse) | 1290 | 3-3-3 |
| Pi | Drinking & Fighting! (Dwarves) | 1250 | 3-5-1 |
| Brian | Blighttown Bashers (Nurgle) | 1330 | 2-5-2 |
| Austin | Y.o.l.o. (Humans) | 1190 | 2-4-3 |
| Mike | Khorn in my Thong (Khorne) | 1340 | 0-6-3 |
Monday, April 15, 2013
League Update: Season 2 Stats
The in-game Hall of Fame boards are, unfortunately, calculated off of players' lifetime stats rather than their season stats, so they're not good indicators of in-season performance. Fortunately for all of you, though, the league commissioner is a big stats nerd and did proper Hall of Fame boards by hand!
In addition, here's some more notable statistics:
BLOOD SBOWL SEASON 2
HALL OF FAME
HALL OF FAME
| Most Improved | Best Scorer | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Best Passer (Yardage) | Best Passer (Completions) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Best Runner | Best Receiver | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Most Violent Player | Best Interceptor | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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In addition, here's some more notable statistics:
Highest Turnover: Team That Lost The Most Players To Deaths And Firings
Deez Hawks (6)
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD: Most Combined Injuries Inflicted And Sustained
Tromaville Terribads and WYLA (33)
Tyin’ Em Up: Player Who Screwed Up The Most Opposing Dodges
Smekhare the First of WYLA (8)
Oh Come On, I Even Took A Skill For It: Player Angriest About Not Winning That Last Award
Julie of the Tromaville Terribads (So Angry)
We’ve Got Spirit, Yes We Do: Largest Cheerleading Squad
Krenlash’s Team and Deez Hawks (1)
The “Remembering That There’s A Ball” Award: Most Yards Gained
Goin Deep of Y.o.l.o. (318)
Quick Hands, Strong Legs: Most Interceptions
Jormungandr’s Revenge of Drinking & Fighting!, only interceptor in league history
Hungry For Victory But Also Other Stuff: Player Who Most Often Tried To Eat Teammates
Toxie of the Tromaville Terribads (It Felt Like A Million)
Toxie of the Tromaville Terribads (It Felt Like A Million)
Season 2 Regular Season Complete!
Here are the regular season standings, preserved for posterity:
Congratulations to WYLA, Krenlash's Team, Tromaville Terribads, and Deez Hawks on their playoff berths!
| Player | Team | TV | W-L-D |
|---|---|---|---|
| Mojo | WYLA (Undead) | 1630 | 6-1-2 |
| Sean | Krenlash's Team (Vampires) | 1510 | 6-2-1 |
| SB | Tromaville Terribads (Underworld) | 1670 | 5-1-3 |
| Alise | Deez Hawks (Wood Elves) | 1000 | 4-4-1 |
| Aaron | Soul Silver (Lizardmen) | 1480 | 4-4-1 |
| Will | The Broman Empire (Norse) | 1290 | 3-3-3 |
| Pi | Drinking & Fighting! (Dwarves) | 1250 | 3-5-1 |
| Brian | Blighttown Bashers (Nurgle) | 1330 | 2-5-2 |
| Austin | Y.o.l.o. (Humans) | 1190 | 2-4-3 |
| Mike | Khorn in my Thong (Khorne) | 1340 | 0-6-3 |
Congratulations to WYLA, Krenlash's Team, Tromaville Terribads, and Deez Hawks on their playoff berths!
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
In Memoriam - Sir Pussy Arm
This season of Blood SBowl has been replete with thrills and chills appropriate for the whole family, provided that nobody in your family gets traumatized easily. We would be remiss, however, if we did not mention with a note of remorse the occasional tragedy, no matter how spectacular it may have been in the moment. It is in this spirit that we take a moment to remember a fallen fixture of the league: Pusstafar Braynard Armondson. Known for his unusually regal diction and effete manner somewhat inappropriate to a Blood Bowler, his teammates took to mockingly calling him "Sir" and "Milord" during basic training. When his accuracy and powerful throwing arm became apparent, however, the mockery turned to admiration (some of it, anyway). From then on his team and supporters referred to him mostly affectionately as "Sir Pussy Arm", we imagine because his full name was so long. Unfortunately, he was torn away from us suddenly during a regular season game against the Tromaville Terribads when the villainous skaven Knuckles pretended to be down and wounded until Pusstafar drew near, at which point he rose up and sunk his claws into the unsuspecting human's face. Of course, this act of treachery will go unpunished because it's wholly within the game rules and honestly it was pretty badass. But that does not mean that we cannot look back fondly upon our fallen friend!
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Advanced Tactics: Injuries
Everybody comes to a game of Blood Bowl looking for some heads to roll. The fans want to see blood spill and, although they may be loathe to admit it, both coaches are aiming to put enemy players in the ground. Conversely, nobody likes to lose players, but if you're looking to run with the same 11 men on the field forever you might want to go play Madden or something. I might write another post in the near future about how best to preserve your squad, but today we're talking all about the opposite.
As you can see, Piling On provides a tremendous improvement over the base casualty rate. What's important to note, though, is that the improvement in the injury rate between the red and blue lines is actually quite small. At AV 6 and 7, using Piling On to reroll failed armor breaks only improves the casualty rate by ~4%, and the effect is reduced significantly as AV climbs (or falls).
Because Piling On leaves your player prone after he has taken his action for the turn, using it significantly reduces that player's usefulness over the next turn. He won't provide any tackle zones during the opponent's upcoming turn and he'll be vulnerable to fouls, and then on your next turn he won't be able to throw another block without using up your blitz (unless he also has Jump Up, which would be unusual but might be something worth thinking about for a player like this). This means you really need to get some value out of knocking him prone, so think carefully about the numbers here before telling him to drop the elbow.
Incidentally, Piling On also interacts pretty favorably with Mighty Blow:
Making A Monster
At this point, the data has made it clear that the most effective killers will have Mighty Blow, Claw, and Piling On, allowing them to cause a casualty on ~20% of their knockdowns. There aren't any positions that start with even two of these skills, however, so you're going to be stuck building your own brutalizer. So in what order do you take the skills to ramp up your killing power as quickly as possible?
The math indicates that Mighty Blow is actually the most important skill. It provides the largest increase in casualty rate on targets with AV 8 or lower and is only slightly less effective than Claw on targets with AV 9. (Claw remains the head-and-shoulders standout against AV 10, but you're not going to run into much of that.) Mighty Blow is so effective, in fact, that it increases casualty rates on blocks even more than improving the block's chances of success; getting an extra successful face--using Block against a player without Block or using Tackle to cancel someone's Dodge--and getting an extra die on the block are both significantly less effective for injuring people than just adding Mighty Blow to your player. Piling On is the runner-up, again increasing casualty rates significantly more than actually improving the quality of your blocks although, like Mighty Blow, it's less effective than Claw against AV 9 and 10 players. (Of course, improving the quality of your blocks knocks opposing players down a lot more, and there's obviously a lot to be said about the value of that even when it doesn't result in a casualty.)
A final note about creating your own killer: Mighty Blow and Piling On are both from the Strength category, and Claw is from the Mutation category. You'll want Strength access on normals on a player that you intend to turn into a casualty machine, and many of these players just won't ever have access to Claw. If you're looking for players that can easily assemble the unholy trinity of smashing skills, the list is fairly short: Chaos Pact Marauders, Khorne Bloodthirsters, Norse Yhetees, Nurgle Warriors and Pestigors, Underworld Blitzers and Trolls, and every player on the Chaos team. Most players on the Underworld and Chaos Pact teams can get there with one double and Skaven Blitzers and Rat Ogres can do the same, while Necromantic Werewolves need two doubles. Be careful about using Piling On on a big guy, though, as their negative traits can make it relatively difficult to get them back up easily and your opponent may be more than happy to gang-foul them while they're down!
The only question left is "Just how much better is one of these teched-out slayers than the average fresh-off-the-assembly-lineman?"
How To Lose Friends And Injure People
I've talked about the math on injuries a bit in previous posts, but here's a refresher. Whenever a player gets fouled or falls down because of a block result (unless Wrestle was used), a failed dodge, or a botched GFI, a 2d6 armor roll is made for that player. If the result of the roll is higher than the player's armor, then a 2d6 injury roll is made for the player, using this result table:
| 2d6 Roll | % of Occurance | Result |
|---|---|---|
| 2-7 | 58 | Stunned |
| 8-9 | 25 | KO |
| 10-12 | 17 | Casualty |
Obviously, you want to get that casualty result as often as possible. It helps with your short-term goal of winning the game by removing an opposing player from the field and it helps with your long-tem goal of team improvement by awarding your player SPP. There are two ways to significantly improve your casualty rate: making better blocks and developing players to cause injuries. (Smart fouling will also help to cause casualties, but there's already a post about that.)
Making better blocks is a little bit complicated. The simplest part is covered here (tl;dr: rolling more dice is good and also Block and Tackle are valuable in the relevant situations), but the more difficult bit--positioning your players and sequencing your actions such that you produce the maximum number of multi-die blocks each turn of the drive--is a bit beyond the scope of this post. Just remember to always have a drive-long strategy in mind when moving and blocking; if you're not thinking about the next turn and the turn after that, you're often going to find yourself losing to an opponent who does. Skill pickups that can help make your blocks better include Guard, Tackle, and Dauntless.
Developing players to cause injuries, on the other hand, is very much within the scope of this post. The most common skill for increasing a player's killing power is Mighty Blow, the influence of which can be seen in this handy visualization:
Making better blocks is a little bit complicated. The simplest part is covered here (tl;dr: rolling more dice is good and also Block and Tackle are valuable in the relevant situations), but the more difficult bit--positioning your players and sequencing your actions such that you produce the maximum number of multi-die blocks each turn of the drive--is a bit beyond the scope of this post. Just remember to always have a drive-long strategy in mind when moving and blocking; if you're not thinking about the next turn and the turn after that, you're often going to find yourself losing to an opponent who does. Skill pickups that can help make your blocks better include Guard, Tackle, and Dauntless.
Developing players to cause injuries, on the other hand, is very much within the scope of this post. The most common skill for increasing a player's killing power is Mighty Blow, the influence of which can be seen in this handy visualization:
Players with the Claw skill treat all enemies as though they are AV 7, which is obviously valuable. It also has a favorable interaction with Mighty Blow, producing the following graph:
The other skill that interacts quite well with Mighty Blow is Piling On, which allows a player to throw himself on top of an enemy that he has just downed in order to reroll either the armor or injury roll for that player. This skill is a little bit less of a no-brainer because it leaves the attacking unit prone, which can range from mildly inconvenient to incredibly dangerous (particularly if the Piling On player is someone valuable that the opponent might like to foul). In order to get the most out of Piling On, you have to know the math (surprise!). In the following chart, the red line represents your percentage chance of causing an injury if you use Piling On any time you fail to injure a downed opponent, while the blue line represents your chance of causing an injury if you use Piling On only to reroll the injury roll after breaking armor:
As you can see, Piling On provides a tremendous improvement over the base casualty rate. What's important to note, though, is that the improvement in the injury rate between the red and blue lines is actually quite small. At AV 6 and 7, using Piling On to reroll failed armor breaks only improves the casualty rate by ~4%, and the effect is reduced significantly as AV climbs (or falls).
Because Piling On leaves your player prone after he has taken his action for the turn, using it significantly reduces that player's usefulness over the next turn. He won't provide any tackle zones during the opponent's upcoming turn and he'll be vulnerable to fouls, and then on your next turn he won't be able to throw another block without using up your blitz (unless he also has Jump Up, which would be unusual but might be something worth thinking about for a player like this). This means you really need to get some value out of knocking him prone, so think carefully about the numbers here before telling him to drop the elbow.
Incidentally, Piling On also interacts pretty favorably with Mighty Blow:
Making A Monster
At this point, the data has made it clear that the most effective killers will have Mighty Blow, Claw, and Piling On, allowing them to cause a casualty on ~20% of their knockdowns. There aren't any positions that start with even two of these skills, however, so you're going to be stuck building your own brutalizer. So in what order do you take the skills to ramp up your killing power as quickly as possible?
The math indicates that Mighty Blow is actually the most important skill. It provides the largest increase in casualty rate on targets with AV 8 or lower and is only slightly less effective than Claw on targets with AV 9. (Claw remains the head-and-shoulders standout against AV 10, but you're not going to run into much of that.) Mighty Blow is so effective, in fact, that it increases casualty rates on blocks even more than improving the block's chances of success; getting an extra successful face--using Block against a player without Block or using Tackle to cancel someone's Dodge--and getting an extra die on the block are both significantly less effective for injuring people than just adding Mighty Blow to your player. Piling On is the runner-up, again increasing casualty rates significantly more than actually improving the quality of your blocks although, like Mighty Blow, it's less effective than Claw against AV 9 and 10 players. (Of course, improving the quality of your blocks knocks opposing players down a lot more, and there's obviously a lot to be said about the value of that even when it doesn't result in a casualty.)
A final note about creating your own killer: Mighty Blow and Piling On are both from the Strength category, and Claw is from the Mutation category. You'll want Strength access on normals on a player that you intend to turn into a casualty machine, and many of these players just won't ever have access to Claw. If you're looking for players that can easily assemble the unholy trinity of smashing skills, the list is fairly short: Chaos Pact Marauders, Khorne Bloodthirsters, Norse Yhetees, Nurgle Warriors and Pestigors, Underworld Blitzers and Trolls, and every player on the Chaos team. Most players on the Underworld and Chaos Pact teams can get there with one double and Skaven Blitzers and Rat Ogres can do the same, while Necromantic Werewolves need two doubles. Be careful about using Piling On on a big guy, though, as their negative traits can make it relatively difficult to get them back up easily and your opponent may be more than happy to gang-foul them while they're down!
The only question left is "Just how much better is one of these teched-out slayers than the average fresh-off-the-assembly-lineman?"
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Match Report: Y.o.l.o. vs. The Broman Empire (Week 4)
Unsurprisingly, the Norse team played the aggressor, throwing more than three times as many blocks as their opponents and scoring nearly three times as many successes.
Y.o.l.o. 1 - 1 The Broman Empire
An ominous storm rolled in as the teams set up, blacking out the sun ominously. The fans worried that this presaged a horrible game full of bloodless shoving and (ugh) scoring, and the first drive nearly bore their fears out. The Broman yhetee broke the potential curse just as the otherwise uneventful play ended, however, sinking his comically oversized claws into Ardtrai the Drinker while Broseidon crossed the goal line. The game continued to tip in the Empire's favor during the second drive as muscular Norse limbs kept finding their way past flimsy human armor, resulting in broken ribs for Goin Deep, two KOs dealt out by Hulk Brogan, and a stunned Yolo Throws dropping the ball right into enemy hands. (Human blitzer Jek the Bawler deserves special mention here for expertly fending off block after block from the Norse without so much as a scratch even as his teammates went to pieces--sometimes literally--around him.) The Broman luck with striking did not extend to ball handling, however, and a series of turnovers by both teams prevented any further scoring during the half.
The sun pierced the clouds during half time, perhaps indicating a change in Y.o.l.o.'s fortunes. That hope got off to a rocky start, however, as the Abominable Broman continued doing the only thing he's good at and sent Jek the Punisher off the field in a pile. Yolo Throws returned the kickoff and showed some ferocity of his own, blitzing down the oncoming Brobi-Wan Kenobi to open a path. Broto Baggins quickly closed it, however, sending Throws to have a relaxing chat with the astrogranite. Morgan Freeman suffered a brutal Norse clothesline as he dashed to claim the ball, but his flailing body knocked the ball right back into Yolo Throws's hands as he recovered. It couldn't have gone better if Freeman had planned it (and, given his history, it probably would have gone worse if he had). Yolo Throws dashed downfield, surviving several attempts to bring him down before the Norse managed to surround and brutalize him. The ball bounced clear into the stands and the rowdy crowd, apparently eager either to see the humans redeem themselves or to give the Norse an excuse for more violence, hurled the ball toward the Norse backfield. Veteran passer G.I. Bro scooped up the "fumble" and attempted a pass, but all the flop sweat pouring off of him must have interfered with his grip and he dropped the ball, making room for blitzer Harold Dalrymple to sneak in and take off with it. The Norse put up an impressive defense, several of them managing to get a hand on Dalrymple during his dash, but no one was able to stop him from scoring the tying point. In the confusion, most people didn't notice Morgan Freeman tripping over his own feet as he fled from a particularly intimidating Norseman. Our sources in the Broman organization tell us that the shattered collarbone he sustained in the fall is only the third worst injury that he has inflicted on himself during his career, and really pales in comparison to that time he managed to get his own shin bone jammed into his eye during practice.
The final drive of the game showed lackluster offense from first the Norse and then the humans (after Bring It headbutted Brofessor X sufficiently hard to make him drop the ball), neither team entertaining any notion of actually scoring during the final seconds. Broto Baggins brought the game to a close with a bang by launching himself bodily at the seemingly invincible Jek the Bawler, hitting hard enough to smash his own hip on impact but not somehow not hard enough to bring Jek down or indeed to even make him notice what had happened.
Asked after the game how he had survived the brutal Norse onslaught, successfully fending off attackers through an impressive 10 attempts on his life, Jek the Bawler simply snorted derisively while gesturing to his team's casualty box, quipping "I don't know what their problem was. Didn't seem so tough to me."
The sun pierced the clouds during half time, perhaps indicating a change in Y.o.l.o.'s fortunes. That hope got off to a rocky start, however, as the Abominable Broman continued doing the only thing he's good at and sent Jek the Punisher off the field in a pile. Yolo Throws returned the kickoff and showed some ferocity of his own, blitzing down the oncoming Brobi-Wan Kenobi to open a path. Broto Baggins quickly closed it, however, sending Throws to have a relaxing chat with the astrogranite. Morgan Freeman suffered a brutal Norse clothesline as he dashed to claim the ball, but his flailing body knocked the ball right back into Yolo Throws's hands as he recovered. It couldn't have gone better if Freeman had planned it (and, given his history, it probably would have gone worse if he had). Yolo Throws dashed downfield, surviving several attempts to bring him down before the Norse managed to surround and brutalize him. The ball bounced clear into the stands and the rowdy crowd, apparently eager either to see the humans redeem themselves or to give the Norse an excuse for more violence, hurled the ball toward the Norse backfield. Veteran passer G.I. Bro scooped up the "fumble" and attempted a pass, but all the flop sweat pouring off of him must have interfered with his grip and he dropped the ball, making room for blitzer Harold Dalrymple to sneak in and take off with it. The Norse put up an impressive defense, several of them managing to get a hand on Dalrymple during his dash, but no one was able to stop him from scoring the tying point. In the confusion, most people didn't notice Morgan Freeman tripping over his own feet as he fled from a particularly intimidating Norseman. Our sources in the Broman organization tell us that the shattered collarbone he sustained in the fall is only the third worst injury that he has inflicted on himself during his career, and really pales in comparison to that time he managed to get his own shin bone jammed into his eye during practice.
The final drive of the game showed lackluster offense from first the Norse and then the humans (after Bring It headbutted Brofessor X sufficiently hard to make him drop the ball), neither team entertaining any notion of actually scoring during the final seconds. Broto Baggins brought the game to a close with a bang by launching himself bodily at the seemingly invincible Jek the Bawler, hitting hard enough to smash his own hip on impact but not somehow not hard enough to bring Jek down or indeed to even make him notice what had happened.
Asked after the game how he had survived the brutal Norse onslaught, successfully fending off attackers through an impressive 10 attempts on his life, Jek the Bawler simply snorted derisively while gesturing to his team's casualty box, quipping "I don't know what their problem was. Didn't seem so tough to me."
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Match Report: Soul Silver vs. WYLA (Week 2)
Soul Silver 1 - 2 WYLA
Fresh off the back of a win in the most brutal game of a truly brutal week, WYLA entered this match looking to repeat the slaughter. Soul Silver's sauruses lined up bravely, practically dripping ferocity, but one could see the skinks shaking from the stands. As the ref blew the starting whistle, the entire crowd visibly leaned forward, anticipating spilled blood and broken bones.
They were not disappointed.
Soul Silver proved to be a well-oiled and very practiced machine, executing a split-second blitz that caught the undead team flat-footed. Before the opening kickoff had even touched the ground, lizard enforcer Swampert flattened WYLA's Rigor Hades and sent him off to the sidelines. Unfortunately, Hades was followed closely by a stretcher carrying the tiny but ruthless--and unconscious--murderer Ekans, who managed to trip himself over the foot of a stunned and stationary Rigor the Barber. The kick fell into the hands of star skink Squirtle (currently in the running for the league's leading scorer position) but he managed to fumble the catch and nearly gave WYLA the chance to recover from the blitz. His fast recovery and even faster feet sealed the point before the opening seconds could even tick off the clock.
Unfortunately, things turned around quite quickly. At the beginning of the next drive, the skink Snivy died during a routine dodge attempt, presaging a game marked by setback after setback for the scalier squad. The undead team's ghouls were the stars of the rest of the game, scoring in the final moments of the first half to tie it up and making almost all of the important blitzes and blocks in the interim. Corpseripper and Carnivorestalker racked up an impressive 70 running yards while injuring Squirtle and spitefully stomping on a downed Blastoise (to no effect), while the rest of the team systematically dismantled any hope of a Soul Silver comeback by mangling any skink they could catch. Wight Thorgrim the Cruel crushed Totadile to steal the ball and score a point at the closing buzzer after surviving a series of increasingly brave and desperate skink blitzes, racking up a second win in as many weeks for WYLA.
Can WYLA maintain their undefeated streak? Can Soul Silver recover from this savage misstep and make the playoffs? It doesn't matter because obviously the Tromaville Terribads are going to win the league, says this unbiased reporter!
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Match Report: Blighttown Bashers vs. Krenlash's Team (Week 1)
The vampire team saw tremendous luck on the block dice, suffering no turnovers and posting an impressive success rate.
The armor breaks fell quite the other way, however.
Blighttown Bashers 2 - 0 Krenlash's Team
A shining spot of relative civility in the bloodiest week the league has ever seen, the contest between the Blighttown Bashers and Krenlash's Team featured less than fifteen gallons of blood spilled and barely any on-field deaths.
This game was characterized by the slow but inexorable march of the undead offenses and extended but ultimately harmless wrestling matches between the slowly decaying players. A pair of Nurgle rotters spent the entire first half moving the ball up the field but ultimately found their push halted by the imposing figure of Count Ivan Draco, who pummeled each of them in turn. It looked as though he would single-handedly stymie the Bashers' drive when suddenly his eyes went red and his thirst for blood overtook him. In his frenzy to feed on one of his lesser teammates, he failed to see the outstretched and decomposing foot of Rise Kujikawa and took an embarrassing tumble. Rotter Cheopis Cragspider took advantage of the lapsed defense and shambled in to score the first point of the game just as the halftime whistle chirped.
The second half belonged almost entirely to the massive, hideous, and massively hideous mutant Quelaag. This terrifying beast of Nurgle spent the entire first half either struggling to understand the coach's screams of "Hit him! HIT HIM!!!" or hypnotized by one particularly charismatic vampire, but the latter half of the game saw a very different performance out of the monster. From the moment the kick landed, Quelaag dogged the ball, staying remarkably light on his weird gross pseudopodia. Vampire ball carrier Norman von Drachenfeld found himself unable to escape Quelaag's invading tentacles (ew), which bogged him down long enough for the Bashers to descend on him in force. A struggle over control of the ball ended when Ivan Draco once again succumbed to his burning bloodlust and dove for a friendly throat, tumbling head over heels and opening the way for another buzzer-beating Nurgle touchdown.
A team of reporters asked Count Draco later in the locker room what prompted his game-throwing performance, to which he responded "SUFFER FOR YOUR IMPUDENCE!" before tearing out two of their throats in one smooth motion. The survivors assure us that it was a spectacular display of athleticism, at least.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
League Update: Season Two Is Coming!
Season Two of the illustrious Blood SBowl league begins FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 1ST! If you intend to play, you need to have your team submitted by some arbitrary point on Friday evening. Don't wait until the last minute to get in!
The competition is really heating up this season. The first outing saw only rookie teams competing for the coveted Golden Caskets, but the fine craftmanship and obvious intrinsic value of the trophy has begun to attract veteran squads from as far afield as Tromaville and Atrophinius's mead garden. The league is taking submissions with any TV between 500 and 2500, so consider how much experience you want on a team before applying. Low TVs are perfectly viable thanks to the magic of inducements, and high TVs allow for a more refined strategy and occasionally some totally ridiculous level-up bonuses (at the cost of feeding inducements to the opponent).
Get your teams built and your applications in, and we'll see you on the pitch!
The competition is really heating up this season. The first outing saw only rookie teams competing for the coveted Golden Caskets, but the fine craftmanship and obvious intrinsic value of the trophy has begun to attract veteran squads from as far afield as Tromaville and Atrophinius's mead garden. The league is taking submissions with any TV between 500 and 2500, so consider how much experience you want on a team before applying. Low TVs are perfectly viable thanks to the magic of inducements, and high TVs allow for a more refined strategy and occasionally some totally ridiculous level-up bonuses (at the cost of feeding inducements to the opponent).
Get your teams built and your applications in, and we'll see you on the pitch!
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Season One Final Standings
Preserved for posterity:
Season One Playoff Standings
Season One Regular Season Standings
Thank you to everyone who made awesome things happen in this first season of Blood SBowl! We had fantastic rivalries, fascinating narratives, and more gallons of blood spilled than most leagues twice our size. Stay tuned for news about season two!
| Position | Player | Team | TV | W-L-D |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1st | SB | Bone Again (Necromantic) | 1310 | 2-0-0 |
| 2nd | Austin | Yoloin Biatches (Amazons) | 1470 | 1-1-0 |
| 3rd | Aaron | THE DUNK SQUAD (Dwarves) | 1400 | 0-1-0 |
| 4th | Will | The Lustful Lizards (Lizardmen) | 1410 | 0-1-0 |
| Player | Team | TV | W-L-D |
|---|---|---|---|
| Aaron | THE DUNK SQUAD (Dwarves) | 1310 | 5-1-1 |
| Will | The Lustful Lizards (Lizardmen) | 1380 | 5-2-0 |
| SB | Bone Again (Necromantic) | 1200 | 4-1-2 |
| Austin | Yoloin Biatches (Amazons) | 1280 | 3-1-3 |
| Pi | Transexual Transylvania (Dark Elves) | 1110 | 3-2-2 |
| Mike | The Mafukin Keglugadins (Orcs) | 1120 | 2-4-1 |
| Sean | Goatman's Revenge (Chaos) | 1130 | 1-6-0 |
| Alise | Tentakillas (Nurgle) | 1020 | 0-6-1 |
Thank you to everyone who made awesome things happen in this first season of Blood SBowl! We had fantastic rivalries, fascinating narratives, and more gallons of blood spilled than most leagues twice our size. Stay tuned for news about season two!
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
To The Victor....
It's been a long road (not really), but the grand finals are finally here! Who will go home with the coveted Golden Caskets? It's sure to be OH HEY I NEVER TOLD YOU GUYS ABOUT THE CASKETS
The Golden Caskets are like the Stanley Cup of the only sport that matters: Blood Bowl played in a league that is managed by SB. Which team will be skilled (and lucky) enough to claim this glorious, slightly morbid, and wholly appropriate prize? Only Nuffle can say!
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
League Update: Regular Season Stats
The regular season is officially over! Here are the hall of fame boards, preserved for posterity (click for readable size):
And here are some other random stats and awards:
And here are some other random stats and awards:
Most Concussed: Player Who Sustained the Most KOs
Heather of the Tentakillas (6)
Iron Skull: Player Who Survived the Most Injuries
Drok Dreng-Troll of THE DUNK SQUAD (4)
Most Graceful: Player Who Failed the Most Dodges
Qlamitl of the Lustful Lizards, Courtney of the Yoloin Biatches, and Chrissy of the Tentakillas (4)
Masters of Brutality: Team Responsible For The Most KOs, Injuries, and Deaths
THE DUNK SQUAD (45, averaging roughly 2 every 5 turns)
The William Murderface Award For Excellence In Manslaughter: Team With the Most Kills
Goatman's Revenge (5)
Glass Jaws: Most KOed Team
Yoloin Biatches (29 with at least one on each player, averaging 4 per game)
The Receiving End: Most Injured Team
Goatman's Revenge (13, averaging 2 per game)
The Actually Playing Blood Bowl Award: Most Yards Gained
The Lustful Lizards (562, nearly 100 more than next-highest team)
Wait, We Can Throw It?: Most Passing Yards
The Mafukin Keglugadins (146, nearly double the next-highest team)
My God, It's Full Of Stars: Team With the Most SPP Earned
The Lustful Lizards (91)
Friday, December 28, 2012
League Update: The Playoffs Approach!
It's almost that time. After the most brutal (and only) season the Blood SBowl league has ever seen, we're only two games away from the playoffs. I'll make a post detailing some league stats once the final week of the regular season has concluded, but for now congratulations to championship hopefuls THE DUNK SQUAD, Bone Again, The Lustful Lizards, and Yoloin Biatches! Team profiles follow:
THE DUNK SQUAD
The most feared team in the league, this slow-rolling dwarven deathsquad owes their playoff position almost entirely to two key players: runner Duerrim, a strong candidate for best rusher in the league, and the unstoppable killing machine Hagan Drek-Troll, who is likely to go home with the league MVP award even if he doesn't manage to capture the championship. Their "punch first, don't ask questions later because that's really time that you could be using to punch some more" style of Blood Bowl has proven to be very effective, clinching them the top position in the league's regular season. A brief interview with THE DUNK SQUAD's coaching staff revealed that only the runners have actually been taught the rules of the game; the rest of the team believes that this whole thing is some sort of elaborate fight club, and it is only the power of their racism that has ensured that they punch the opposing team instead of each other. An unusual strategy to be sure, but it's hard to argue with the results!
Bone Again
Laboring under not one, not two, but FOURTEEN ancient curses placed on various players and support staff by different priests, witches, and warlocks that they've managed to offend, this plucky necromantic squad has managed to limp into the playoffs despite a plague of injuries. Supporters of the club, colloquially known as Boners, say that the team's incredible resilience can be attributed to a pair of expert carpenters who spend hours before every game reinforcing their zombies with nails and random bits of wood that they've pried out of the stands. If true, one wonders why these carpenters can't be bothered to help the perpetually injured wights and flesh golems that (occasionally) form the backbone of the team's defense. Fortunately, fan (and manager) favorites Growl and Howl have managed to avoid the curses thus far, allowing them to carry their team kicking and screaming into competition for the cup.
The Lustful Lizards
Long regarded as the best way for at-risk skinks to escape their circumstances, the Lustful Lizards recruit almost entirely from poor, high-crime areas of Lustria. Their coaching staff assures us that these lizards are both more determined and better at taking a beating than their well-off counterparts from Tlaxtlan. The Lustrian coaching staff has managed to forge their offbeat recruits into arguably the best-balanced team in the league, capable of both figuratively stunning feats of agility and literally stunning feats of extreme violence. The Lizards boast both the best running game in the league and one of the highest rates of injuries dealt, with every single skink and saurus making significant contribution to the team's regular season run. Rookie kroxigor Chupacabra has yet to prove himself, but since all he has to do is be imposing and crack some skulls we're confident that he'll figure his role out.
Yoloin Biatches
This Amazon squad lives for risk, playing harder and less safely than anyone else both on and off the field. Rookie Biatches aren't even allowed onto the pitch until they've survived a dozen Yoloin halftime shows, which often include spectacles such death-defying leaps through rings of flame, gator baiting, and 12 or more rounds of bareknuckle boxing. Once she's made the team proper, each woman is expected to throw full-body blocks, dive desperately after fallen balls, leap dramatically over enemy defenders, and basically endanger her life at every available opportunity, often with little or no justification. As such, any Amazon worth her salt has suffered at least a dozen concussions and is constantly covered in bruises and contusions. Their tendency toward ridiculous stunts and outrageous upsets has not gone unnoticed by fans, earning them a tremendous and rabid following. This squad has a long-standing and mostly one-sided rivalry with the necromantic team Bone Again, whose very existence flies in the face of all that it is to only live once.
Good luck to everybody in the playoffs!
THE DUNK SQUAD
The most feared team in the league, this slow-rolling dwarven deathsquad owes their playoff position almost entirely to two key players: runner Duerrim, a strong candidate for best rusher in the league, and the unstoppable killing machine Hagan Drek-Troll, who is likely to go home with the league MVP award even if he doesn't manage to capture the championship. Their "punch first, don't ask questions later because that's really time that you could be using to punch some more" style of Blood Bowl has proven to be very effective, clinching them the top position in the league's regular season. A brief interview with THE DUNK SQUAD's coaching staff revealed that only the runners have actually been taught the rules of the game; the rest of the team believes that this whole thing is some sort of elaborate fight club, and it is only the power of their racism that has ensured that they punch the opposing team instead of each other. An unusual strategy to be sure, but it's hard to argue with the results!
Bone Again
Laboring under not one, not two, but FOURTEEN ancient curses placed on various players and support staff by different priests, witches, and warlocks that they've managed to offend, this plucky necromantic squad has managed to limp into the playoffs despite a plague of injuries. Supporters of the club, colloquially known as Boners, say that the team's incredible resilience can be attributed to a pair of expert carpenters who spend hours before every game reinforcing their zombies with nails and random bits of wood that they've pried out of the stands. If true, one wonders why these carpenters can't be bothered to help the perpetually injured wights and flesh golems that (occasionally) form the backbone of the team's defense. Fortunately, fan (and manager) favorites Growl and Howl have managed to avoid the curses thus far, allowing them to carry their team kicking and screaming into competition for the cup.
The Lustful Lizards
Long regarded as the best way for at-risk skinks to escape their circumstances, the Lustful Lizards recruit almost entirely from poor, high-crime areas of Lustria. Their coaching staff assures us that these lizards are both more determined and better at taking a beating than their well-off counterparts from Tlaxtlan. The Lustrian coaching staff has managed to forge their offbeat recruits into arguably the best-balanced team in the league, capable of both figuratively stunning feats of agility and literally stunning feats of extreme violence. The Lizards boast both the best running game in the league and one of the highest rates of injuries dealt, with every single skink and saurus making significant contribution to the team's regular season run. Rookie kroxigor Chupacabra has yet to prove himself, but since all he has to do is be imposing and crack some skulls we're confident that he'll figure his role out.
Yoloin Biatches
This Amazon squad lives for risk, playing harder and less safely than anyone else both on and off the field. Rookie Biatches aren't even allowed onto the pitch until they've survived a dozen Yoloin halftime shows, which often include spectacles such death-defying leaps through rings of flame, gator baiting, and 12 or more rounds of bareknuckle boxing. Once she's made the team proper, each woman is expected to throw full-body blocks, dive desperately after fallen balls, leap dramatically over enemy defenders, and basically endanger her life at every available opportunity, often with little or no justification. As such, any Amazon worth her salt has suffered at least a dozen concussions and is constantly covered in bruises and contusions. Their tendency toward ridiculous stunts and outrageous upsets has not gone unnoticed by fans, earning them a tremendous and rabid following. This squad has a long-standing and mostly one-sided rivalry with the necromantic team Bone Again, whose very existence flies in the face of all that it is to only live once.
Good luck to everybody in the playoffs!
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Blood Bowl Basics: Apothecaries
When a player's blood splatters on the pitch, everyone in the stadium cheers. Fans, players, and coaches alike eagerly anticipate the echoing crunch of a good armor break, looking forward to an easier game for their team (or an excuse for bloodthirsty vengeance). The apothecaries at the sidelines get excited as well, but their joy is more about the gold falling into their pockets than the game.
Single-Player Healthcare
Apothecaries can fix the most grievous wounds or even bring the dead back to life, but other times they'll nearly kill a man when tending to his sprained ankle. Basically, these guys have no idea what they're doing; bring an injured player over to them and they'll go at him arbitrarily with saws and bandages until something happens. Despite their unreliability, apothecaries are tremendously useful. At a one-time cost of 50,000 gold, they pay for themselves (and then some) the first time they save a player's career, and it's likely they'll do that half a dozen times in a season.
An apothecary can only be used once each game, and performs one of the following functions.
Rerolling a Casualty
An apothecary can let you reroll a casualty roll and then select either result. This can let you turn a serious injury or even a death into something less permanent, which is obviously extremely valuable. Nobody likes losing a level 4 player with two stat gains, and the apothecary keeps that from happening (sometimes). It gets even better, though: selecting a Badly Hurt result when using an apothecary will result in your player not being injured at all. He still gets pulled off the field, but he'll be available again at the start of the next drive. You can even use your apothecary to reroll a Badly Hurt just so you can select it to keep your player in the game.
Preventing a KO
When one of your players gets KOed, the apothecary can change the result to a stun instead. This may seem weak, indeed almost wasteful, compared to the apothecary's other function, but we've all had players get KOed and then stubbornly refuse to get up. Preventing that guy from going to the KO box in the first place gives you an extra player all game, which works out the same as saving him from an injury (or better, if the drive lasts longer than his stun).
Primum Non Nocere
Apothecaries are very powerful and an extraordinary value, so every team should have one. However, you don't necessarily need one right away. Buying an extra discounted reroll instead of an apothecary during team creation will probably serve you better in both the short and long term. Also, when your team is just starting out and you haven't been able to afford all your positionals yet, you may get more value out of devoting your gold to picking up players. As soon as your blitzers and scorers start developing, though, an apothecary is the only thing that will keep your heart from stopping for a second every time an opponent rolls a pow.
Single-Player Healthcare
Apothecaries can fix the most grievous wounds or even bring the dead back to life, but other times they'll nearly kill a man when tending to his sprained ankle. Basically, these guys have no idea what they're doing; bring an injured player over to them and they'll go at him arbitrarily with saws and bandages until something happens. Despite their unreliability, apothecaries are tremendously useful. At a one-time cost of 50,000 gold, they pay for themselves (and then some) the first time they save a player's career, and it's likely they'll do that half a dozen times in a season.
An apothecary can only be used once each game, and performs one of the following functions.
Rerolling a Casualty
An apothecary can let you reroll a casualty roll and then select either result. This can let you turn a serious injury or even a death into something less permanent, which is obviously extremely valuable. Nobody likes losing a level 4 player with two stat gains, and the apothecary keeps that from happening (sometimes). It gets even better, though: selecting a Badly Hurt result when using an apothecary will result in your player not being injured at all. He still gets pulled off the field, but he'll be available again at the start of the next drive. You can even use your apothecary to reroll a Badly Hurt just so you can select it to keep your player in the game.
Preventing a KO
When one of your players gets KOed, the apothecary can change the result to a stun instead. This may seem weak, indeed almost wasteful, compared to the apothecary's other function, but we've all had players get KOed and then stubbornly refuse to get up. Preventing that guy from going to the KO box in the first place gives you an extra player all game, which works out the same as saving him from an injury (or better, if the drive lasts longer than his stun).
Primum Non Nocere
Apothecaries are very powerful and an extraordinary value, so every team should have one. However, you don't necessarily need one right away. Buying an extra discounted reroll instead of an apothecary during team creation will probably serve you better in both the short and long term. Also, when your team is just starting out and you haven't been able to afford all your positionals yet, you may get more value out of devoting your gold to picking up players. As soon as your blitzers and scorers start developing, though, an apothecary is the only thing that will keep your heart from stopping for a second every time an opponent rolls a pow.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Blood Bowl Basics: Inducements
Some games seem destined for a loss. League compositions can be unpredictable and sometimes your crew of fresh-faced rookies goes up against a brigade of psychopaths wearing shoulderpads and jockstraps made out of all the opponents they've killed. How can you beat that without cheating? Thanks to inducements, you won't have to!
Who Needs Skill?
In each game of Blood Bowl, the team with the lowest Team Value is awarded money equal to one thousand times the difference between the teams' TVs with which to buy inducements, which are basically league-sanctioned cheats intended to give the little guy a chance. These things are the reason that you need to watch your TV and make sure it doesn't spiral out of control. If you're not careful, here's what you might have to face:
$50,000 (50 TV difference)
Bloodweiser Babes: You can purchase up to two of these young ladies, each of whom will use a combination of magic beer and cleavage to give your team a +1 bonus on KO rolls. Normally, each of your KOed players makes a d6 roll at the beginning of each drive and wakes up on 4+, so one of these takes this to a 3+ and two take it to a 2+. A Bloodweiser Babe is (almost) the only thing that costs less than $100,000, so they're relatively common. It's rarely correct to take two Babes. though, as you'll usually get more use out of the team reroll or apothecary that you could get instead.
$100,000 (100 TV difference)
Team Reroll: You can get an extra team reroll per half for just $100K, which is a pretty fantastic deal. You should have some idea of exactly how good an extra reroll is for your team, and you'll probably find that this works quite well for you.
Wandering Apothecary: This functions exactly the same way as a normal apothecary, allowing you to reroll one casualty roll during the game (or turn one KO into a stun instead). This allows you to have two apothecaries for a game, but each casualty roll can only be rerolled once. If you're up against a team that you're afraid is going to punch your face in, this is probably a better way of keeping your team up and running than buying two Bloodweiser Babes.
Igor: Teams that can't buy apothecaries also can't buy wandering apothecaries, but they can recruit one of these surgeons of undead flesh instead. An Igor allows a reroll of one Regeneration roll during the game.
Bribe: A bribe allows you to attempt to change the ref's mind when he tries to eject one of your players for throwing a foul or wielding a secret weapon. You roll a d6 and on a 2+ your player doesn't get ejected. This can be a good buy if the opponent has a particularly useful player or two that will cramp your game plan, as it allows you to be a bit more liberal with your fouls on that guy. Bribes are super great for the Goblin team due to their extensive secret weapon use, and fortunately for them all Blood Bowl refs are both goblin and racist. Goblin teams pay only half price ($50K) for bribes.
$150,000 (150 TV difference)
Wizard: A hired wizard will sit on your sidelines booing loudly and incessantly pulling rabbits out of his hat to terrify the opposition. Additionally, the wizard will cast one spell for you during the game. At either the very beginning of your turn (before you have declared any actions) or at the very end (even if your turn ended with a turnover) the wizard can cast either a fireball or a lightning bolt, targeted at any square of your choice. The lightning bolt hits the player in the targeted square, knocking him down on a d6 roll of 2+. The fireball hits the targeted square and all adjacent squares, but only knocks down on a 4+. Lightning bolts can be powerful for giving a slow team a way of stopping an offensive breakaway of the kind that elves and gutter runners often make, while fireballs are a (somewhat unreliable) way of breaking down difficult cages.
$300,000 (300 TV difference)
Halfling Master Chef: Yes, that says $300,000. It might actually be worthwhile, though. A Halfling Master Chef steals rerolls from the opposing team and gives them to you, but the number is variable. At the beginning of each half you roll 3d6 for your Master Chef and on each 4+ you steal one reroll from the opposing team. The odds breakdown is pretty simple: 12.5% 0 steals, 37.5% 1 steal, 37.5% 2 steals, and 12.5% 3 steals. The Master Chef compares pretty positively with the same value worth of team rerolls; even if you only roll 1 steal, it's arguable that your opponent losing a reroll is actually better for you than getting two rerolls of your own would have been. Of course, there's always the chance that your Master Chef screws up, but if you don't like gambling you should probably take up a different game. Because Master Chefs are even more racist than referees, Halfling teams can hire a Chef at one-third of normal cost, making them as cheap as team rerolls.
Variable
Mercenaries ($50,000-$240,000): A mercenary can be hired to fill any position on your team that isn't already filled (for example, if you're allowed 2 blitzers but you only have 1, you could hire a mercenary blitzer). A mercenary costs $30,000 more than it would cost to hire a normal player for the position, and mercenaries carry the Loner skill because they're not used to playing with your team. That's obviously a pretty bad deal, but sometimes you can't afford to leave an important position vacant after an unfortunate injury or death. You can choose for the mercenary to come equipped with any one skill that his position could take on a normal improvement roll, but it adds $50,000 to his cost. (If your team is injured badly enough that you can't field 11 players at the beginning of a game, the empty slots will be filled with mercenaries of your team's 0-16 position and your TV will be adjusted up as though those players were normal members of your team.)
Star Players ($60,000-$430,000): Star Players are extraordinarily skilled free agents that command hefty appearance fees. Most of them are very selective about which races they'll play with, though, so most teams will only have access to a few Stars even if they have all the necessary cash. Learn which Star Players your team has access to and figure out the situations for which they'd be ideal. (I could also write an article about Star Players if people would like.)
Mo TV, Less Cheating (But Still Some Cheating)
The higher TV team can get access to inducements too, but it's going to cost them. A team can transfer any amount of money from their treasury to their inducement fund, but their TV increases by one thousandth of the money they transfer. This means that the higher team could buy (for example) a Bloodweiser Babe, but doing so would cost them $50,000 from their treasury AND increase their TV by 50 for the game, so the lower team would also get an extra $50,000.
The lower team can transfer money from their treasury the same way, but the fact that it increases their TV makes it self-defeating in most cases. If you don't have enough inducement money to afford an inducement that you desperately need, you can contribute enough money from your treasury to purchase it, but be aware of the TV change you're causing. For example, if a 1000 TV Human team decides that they need a wizard to fight their 1100 TV Elf opponents, they can get it by contributing $150,000 from their treasury. This temporarily increases their TV to 1150, meaning that the Elf team will actually receive $50,000 in free inducement money for the match. This is a high price to pay for an inducement, but it could be worthwhile for a gamesaver.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Blood Bowl Basics: Formations
A lot happens in a Blood Bowl drive. Spines are shattered, curses are shouted, riots are incited, and occasionally somebody even picks up the ball. It's easy to get caught up in all the action and not notice the shaping effects that cause the scrum to occur in these squares and not those squares (or even those other squares over there). Some of that shaping comes from the coaches working hard, action by action, to drive the ball into the place best for them, but a surprisingly large part of it comes from the formations in which the players set up at the beginning of the drive.
Setting Up For Victory
There are a lot of things to consider when setting up. I'm going to show you some example formations, but always think about the relative speed and strength of the teams in your game before using any of these. Some formations work best against strong, slow lineups, while others are best for containing elf plays. The best lineup will change from play to play as well, depending on the number of turns left in the half, the number and composition of each team's injuries, and what you predict your opponent's strategy might be. Keep your eyes open and your brain working!
One common defense is known as the column defense or the 3-4-4, so called because it places three defenders on the front line, 4 defenders on a second line, and 4 defenders on a third line. A "collapsed" 3-4-4 might look like this (shown using Norse in blue):
Setting Up For Victory
There are a lot of things to consider when setting up. I'm going to show you some example formations, but always think about the relative speed and strength of the teams in your game before using any of these. Some formations work best against strong, slow lineups, while others are best for containing elf plays. The best lineup will change from play to play as well, depending on the number of turns left in the half, the number and composition of each team's injuries, and what you predict your opponent's strategy might be. Keep your eyes open and your brain working!
One common defense is known as the column defense or the 3-4-4, so called because it places three defenders on the front line, 4 defenders on a second line, and 4 defenders on a third line. A "collapsed" 3-4-4 might look like this (shown using Norse in blue):
Obvious strengths of the 3-4-4 are that it creates a strong band of tackle zones across the field and that it's resistant to enemy blitzes. There's no spot where a single blitz can open up a TZ-free path for a ball carrier. It's not impregnable, of course; any knockdown attained on the line of scrimmage can be accompanied with a push in the opposite direction to start forming a hole, like this:
It only takes one knockdown at the LoS for this to happen. Any more than that makes a more open and defensible path for the offense. Obviously, this is less of a concern if you can prevent the enemy players from having strong blocks at the line, either through skills (lots of Guard, perhaps) or a significant ST advantage. You can defend against this to some degree by running a staggered 3-4-4 that looks like this:
This reduces the opponent's ability to run up the middle by adding some tackle zones to the middle three squares at the cost of opening up the sidelines to blitzes a little. This defense is a little worse against a frenzy blitz (as assists from the end linemen in the back 4 can be denied easily, making the second frenzy block safer) but stronger against stunties and high AG dodgers who will potentially have to make an extra dodge to get through the formation. As you can see, there are a lot of ways to adjust any formation to make little tradeoffs like this. As always, keep your head in the game and figure out the variation that works best for your situation.
A defensive option that might be slightly more effective against dodgy teams (especially stunty dodgers) is the 5-5-1 (also known more verbosely as 3-2-3-2-1), shown here in both flattened and spread variants:
This formation has an obvious weakness to a block on a corner lineman followed by a blitz on the player behind him, so I really only recommend this if you're playing against a team where you have a significant ST advantage, which fortunately will usually be the case against many stunty teams. If the enemy team is ST-disadvantaged, they'll have to spend enough players performing the initial hit and blitz that they probably won't also be able to form a defense for their ball carrier. This formation includes a significant backfield presence, which can be useful against fast teams trying to sneak through.
Offensive setups are often a little more complex, because the offense has a lot more information to work with. When you set up your offense, you need to take note of both the general shape of the enemy formation and the position of important defensive players (unusually high-ST players, guys with Strip Ball, etc.). Unfortunately, the information you don't have is where the ball will land, so you need to keep a couple of guys in the backfield no matter your formation (and against fast defenses, you need to make sure to protect them!). You can easily line up symmetrical formations and position assists to enjoy your first turn advantage without any help from me, so let's talk about some more interesting strategies.
A strong side offense like this allows you to concentrate your offensive power on fighting a smaller portion of the enemy team for a couple of turns while the weak side players try to catch up to the action. This is a particularly useful strategy if your opponent has a few well-developed players grouped up on one side, as you can avoid them for a few turns (or more, if you can get them marked before they get to the fight). It's also great for capitalizing on injuries that leave the opposing defense uneven. Your battle plan might look something like this:
If you score any knockdowns at all with your blocks, this puts you in a pretty strong position for next turn with a number of enemy players hard-pressed to contribute at all (and probably your guys on your weak side will contribute by marking them or something). This is pretty optimistic, though. If the ball falls on the weak side, you might be in some trouble if you can't reliably make a lateral pass. For this reason, I'd be pretty leery of using this kind of offense against a team with Kick. A strong side offense also loses some utility against fast players who can contribute to defense anywhere on the field quickly and can really punish a weak side kick.
Who's On The Line?
One other important thing to consider is who goes on the line of scrimmage. Three players are required to stand right in the opponent's face, and it's important to know what that means. Against some teams the line will be a killing zone festooned with ST 4 claw-wielding psychopaths, while other teams might just put up three lackluster dead guys. (The kicking team may have to do some guessing here, unfortunately.) Think carefully about what you want your line to do. If you can't fight the enemy line (or if fighting it would take up too much of your bashing ability) it might be wise to place disposable linemen (or zombies or beastmen or whatever) there just to tie up the enemy fighters as long as possible while placing your own fighters where they can contribute to moving or stealing the ball. Each team has a limited amount of murdering power, so mete it out carefully; only use as much as is actually helpful on the line and get the rest of it out there intimidating the enemy playmakers.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Blood Bowl Basics: Team Management
At the end of the player development post, I mentioned that player improvements bloat your Team Value, which can lead to your opponents entering the game with more cheaty wizards and chefs and star players. "That sounds dangerous!" I hear you cry. Well, good eye. That stuff will kill you. But it's okay, I'm here to teach you how to develop a devastating team without getting devastated in return.
Too Big To Succeed?
First, let's tackle the elephant in the room: Is it always good to improve a player? It's true that improving a player improves your game overall, which is to say that yes, it is always good to improve a player. But that's not really the question; the question is whether a given improvement helps your team more than it helps the opposing team.
Everything that helps your team, from rerolls to Fan Factor to the players themselves, has a Value. The Value of a team element is based on its initial cost and then, in the case of players, augmented by any improvements they may have. The Value of all of your team elements combined is your Team Value. At the beginning of each game, your Team Value will be compared to your opponent's Team Value, and the team with the lower Value will receive money equal to 1,000 times the difference with which to buy inducements (things like extra rerolls or the wizard I keep mentioning). The point here is that every time you increase your Team Value, you increase the the inducement money your opponents will receive (or decrease the money you will receive, if you're the lower team). This means that you want every improvement to your team to be better for you than the Value it adds is for your opponent. Let's talk about the non-player elements that inflate Team Value.
Managing the Bloat
Your TV is going to go up as your team improves. There's not a lot that can be done about it, and frankly most improvements are more than worth their TV cost. You want your team to get better, and that means a slow TV climb. There are things you can do, however, to maximize your increase in game-winning ability per point of TV.
First of all, pay attention to your injuries and fire players who are injured in a way that interferes with their job. -AG is a career-ending injury on a thrower or catcher, for example, while it means nothing to a minotaur or troll. Firing critically injured players serves your team development in another way as well: it prevents them from claiming the MVP from the bench and robbing your useful players of SPP. The value of keeping your roster trim is significant.
In the same vein (and as mentioned above), don't employ a half-dozen extra players who don't spend time on the field. If they're not out on the pitch shedding blood for you, they're only helping the opponent. It may be worthwhile to keep an extra man or two in reserve if you have an important strategic use for them, however. Examples include a backup player on a low-AV team as a replacement for KOs/injured players, replacement players for your Secret Weapon guys so that you're not playing short-handed after the first drive, and a second-stringer to replace called-out players if you like to rely on fouls (but make sure you know the math before you try this).
Finally, think hard about the climbing costs of your non-vital players. If a player like a skink or a zombie lineman gets a third or fourth skill without getting any extraordinary rolls, they may just not be worth the TV they're adding anymore. This obviously is a complex issue that there's no hard and fast rule for, but carefully consider whether a developed player on your team is worth the 60-100 TV they're costing you. Is that goblin worth an extra team reroll every game? Would you rather have a Bloodweiser babe than that lineman?
Travelling the Old World On 1000 TV A Day
Remember that the important thing is the difference between your TV and that of your opponent. A TV of 1400 has a very different meaning in a league that averages 1800 than it does in a league that averages 1100. Keep your eyes on the TVs around you and be prepared for the inducements that you'll have to face (or that you'll get to wield).
Too Big To Succeed?
First, let's tackle the elephant in the room: Is it always good to improve a player? It's true that improving a player improves your game overall, which is to say that yes, it is always good to improve a player. But that's not really the question; the question is whether a given improvement helps your team more than it helps the opposing team.
Everything that helps your team, from rerolls to Fan Factor to the players themselves, has a Value. The Value of a team element is based on its initial cost and then, in the case of players, augmented by any improvements they may have. The Value of all of your team elements combined is your Team Value. At the beginning of each game, your Team Value will be compared to your opponent's Team Value, and the team with the lower Value will receive money equal to 1,000 times the difference with which to buy inducements (things like extra rerolls or the wizard I keep mentioning). The point here is that every time you increase your Team Value, you increase the the inducement money your opponents will receive (or decrease the money you will receive, if you're the lower team). This means that you want every improvement to your team to be better for you than the Value it adds is for your opponent. Let's talk about the non-player elements that inflate Team Value.
- Team Rerolls increase your Team Value by a thousandth of their initial cost. This Value varies by team between 40 and 70 inclusive. The cost of Team Rerolls doubles after team creation, but their Value doesn't double. Team Rerolls are extremely powerful and are nearly always worth their Value increase. (For comparison, the inducement cost of an extra reroll is 100,000 gold, meaning a TV difference of 100.)
- Fan Factor increases your Team Value by 10 per point. You have a chance to gain Fan Factor every time you win a match and a chance to lose some every time you lose a match. You can also purchase Fan Factor for 10,000 gold per point, but Fan Factor improves your team by such a small amount that this is not a worthwhile purchase. Your Fan Factor is going to vary up and down almost in spite of you and it's really not even worth thinking about.
- An Apothecary increases your Team Value by 50. The Apothecary is invaluable and you obviously want one, but the cost and the TV increase may make it worth playing your first few games without one. You should get one as soon as you start developing valuable players, however.
- Cheerleaders increase your Team Value by 10 each. One kickoff event (with a ~14% chance of occurring) uses each team's number of cheerleaders along with a couple of random factors to determine which of the teams will receive an extra team reroll. This is not worth the TV increase in my opinion, but I suppose if you bought enough of them you could secure the reroll every time that kickoff event comes up.
- Assistant coaches are exactly the same as cheerleaders, except for a different kickoff event which also has a ~14% occurrence rate and functions exactly the same as the cheerleader event.
- 20 Value for each skill the player has gained from one of his Normal categories.
- 30 Value for each skill the player has gained from one of his Double categories.
- 30 Value for each point of MA or AV the player has gained.
- 40 Value for each point of AG the player has gained.
- 50 Value for each point of ST the player has gained.
Managing the Bloat
Your TV is going to go up as your team improves. There's not a lot that can be done about it, and frankly most improvements are more than worth their TV cost. You want your team to get better, and that means a slow TV climb. There are things you can do, however, to maximize your increase in game-winning ability per point of TV.
First of all, pay attention to your injuries and fire players who are injured in a way that interferes with their job. -AG is a career-ending injury on a thrower or catcher, for example, while it means nothing to a minotaur or troll. Firing critically injured players serves your team development in another way as well: it prevents them from claiming the MVP from the bench and robbing your useful players of SPP. The value of keeping your roster trim is significant.
In the same vein (and as mentioned above), don't employ a half-dozen extra players who don't spend time on the field. If they're not out on the pitch shedding blood for you, they're only helping the opponent. It may be worthwhile to keep an extra man or two in reserve if you have an important strategic use for them, however. Examples include a backup player on a low-AV team as a replacement for KOs/injured players, replacement players for your Secret Weapon guys so that you're not playing short-handed after the first drive, and a second-stringer to replace called-out players if you like to rely on fouls (but make sure you know the math before you try this).
Finally, think hard about the climbing costs of your non-vital players. If a player like a skink or a zombie lineman gets a third or fourth skill without getting any extraordinary rolls, they may just not be worth the TV they're adding anymore. This obviously is a complex issue that there's no hard and fast rule for, but carefully consider whether a developed player on your team is worth the 60-100 TV they're costing you. Is that goblin worth an extra team reroll every game? Would you rather have a Bloodweiser babe than that lineman?
Travelling the Old World On 1000 TV A Day
Remember that the important thing is the difference between your TV and that of your opponent. A TV of 1400 has a very different meaning in a league that averages 1800 than it does in a league that averages 1100. Keep your eyes on the TVs around you and be prepared for the inducements that you'll have to face (or that you'll get to wield).
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Match Report: Goatman's Revenge vs THE DUNK SQUAD (Week 2)
THE DUNK SQUAD had both a lot of successes and a lot of failures on the block dice against Goatman's Revenge's low-skull high-pow composition.
The Chaos team saw quite a bit of luck on the d6, but nobody from either team made a successful dodge at any point. It was a slow, foot-slogging game.
Goatman's Revenge 0 - 1 THE DUNK SQUAD
We've already seen a few brutal games this season, but the violence in this battle between furry animal men and dwarves who are somehow even hairier was characterized by a certain cruelty uncommon to the field of competition. Most Blood Bowlers kill because they love to kill, but one had the sense that these players were killing because they actually wanted their opponents to die.
This game started much more calmly than THE DUNK SQUAD's last outing; this time it wasn't until turn 2 that Hagan Drek-Troll mangled someone so badly that they had to be rolled off the pitch in a wheelbarrow. The dwarves received and attempted to run the ball up the sideline but found their progress halted by one group of beastmen while another, led by the minotaur Atrophinius, tussled with the dwarf offensive line. As previously noted, Hagan Drek-Troll drew first blood by sending goatfellow Mashlow Tail to the uncontrollable hemorrhaging tent while his teammate Kazain collapsed the helmet of lone Chaos warrior Dhaos Fangepile. The Chaos team's equipment manager would spend most of the match with a mallet trying to creatively remangle the helm enough for Dhaos to be able to see out of it again. Beastman Thishgy Antler struck back immediately, managing to ram Drok Dreng-Troll off the pitch and into the waiting arms of the fans. The violence on the field may have just started, but the spectators had been rioting for hours and were working at a fevered pitch of bloodlust. (THE DUNK SQUAD's apothecaries managed to fish most of Drok out of the crowd during halftime.) Enraged by the loss of his kin, Hagan Drek-Troll led the dwarven line on a rampage, headbutting Atrophinius in his massive cowgroin and then stomping on his head when he collapsed. The foul was called, but when Hagan turned his baleful crazyeyes on the ref the official pretended that the call was about something else and sent Thor off instead. Hagan turned his attention back to the business at hand and spent the rest of the half alternately knocking down and being knocked down by the minotaur. Brashfy Claw took an opportunity during the struggle to put a hoof to Hagan while he was down and, seeing the look still in Hagan's eyes, the referee pulled the goatman out of the game for his own protection. The ball, meanwhile, was knocked free of dwarven hands when the beastman Cra-tigor hurled himself into a flying cross body block to bowl over dwarf runner Duerrim. Neither Dunker nor Revenger made any headway with it before the half was called.
The second half started much the same but running in the other direction. The Chaos line went man-to-man, surprising and briefly scattering the dwarven line with their ferocity. Hagan Drek-Troll was unfazed and continued to bust heads, seemingly stunning a different Chaos player each turn. Beastman Thishgy Antler recovered the kickoff and attempted to find a hole in the melee by running up the same sideline against which the ball had been trapped in the first half with much the same result. After a few turns of back-and-forth struggling over the fallen ball, dwarf blocker Kazain saw an opening and went for it, only to bobble the pickup and knock the ball into the fans. After a brief scuffle, the ball was hurled back onto the field significantly closer to the dwarven scoring zone. Unfortunately, the churning of the midfield carnage left most of the Revengers in very poor position to attempt a recovery. Goatbro Cry-mulgors got control of the ball for a moment but was completely isolated from his team, and the dwarves predictably carried the ball into the endzone with pieces of him still clinging to it. The touchdown seemed to improve Hagan Drek-Troll's mood a bit, although his celebratory headbutt hospitalized Chaos lineman Slouk-mulgor.
The final drive began on turn 15, leaving Goatman's Revenge with very little chance of an answering point. The dwarven kick flew out of bounds, however, and the Chaos coach took the risky move of giving the touchback to unprotected lineman Tralow Tail. Tralow's teammates cleared him a path, however, and he made a wild dash for the endzone, landing a brutal hornbutt on the only dwarven defender in the backfield. Hagan Drek-Troll, lynchpin of the dwarven defense (and, indeed, entire team), gave desperate chase, but failed for the first time in the game to inflict any violence at all as the goatman eluded his grasp. Dhaos Fangepile, now sighted thanks to the intervention of a crowbar and a can opener but still quite wobbly, trundled after in an attempt to rescue his teammate, but he succeeded only in tripping, falling on his face, and distracting Tralow with his shouts. Unfortunately, the goatman's momentary hesitation saw the clock run out before he could make it to the endzone.
Hagan Drek-Troll threw one last gut shot in the final moment to punish Thishgy Antler for touching and thereby besmirching the ball, which he described as "a relic of dwarven history, you hooved arsehole". The beastman lay unconscious on the field until long after the dwarven team had been dispatched to the now-empty stands to look for the rest of Drok Dreng-Troll's arm.
This game started much more calmly than THE DUNK SQUAD's last outing; this time it wasn't until turn 2 that Hagan Drek-Troll mangled someone so badly that they had to be rolled off the pitch in a wheelbarrow. The dwarves received and attempted to run the ball up the sideline but found their progress halted by one group of beastmen while another, led by the minotaur Atrophinius, tussled with the dwarf offensive line. As previously noted, Hagan Drek-Troll drew first blood by sending goatfellow Mashlow Tail to the uncontrollable hemorrhaging tent while his teammate Kazain collapsed the helmet of lone Chaos warrior Dhaos Fangepile. The Chaos team's equipment manager would spend most of the match with a mallet trying to creatively remangle the helm enough for Dhaos to be able to see out of it again. Beastman Thishgy Antler struck back immediately, managing to ram Drok Dreng-Troll off the pitch and into the waiting arms of the fans. The violence on the field may have just started, but the spectators had been rioting for hours and were working at a fevered pitch of bloodlust. (THE DUNK SQUAD's apothecaries managed to fish most of Drok out of the crowd during halftime.) Enraged by the loss of his kin, Hagan Drek-Troll led the dwarven line on a rampage, headbutting Atrophinius in his massive cowgroin and then stomping on his head when he collapsed. The foul was called, but when Hagan turned his baleful crazyeyes on the ref the official pretended that the call was about something else and sent Thor off instead. Hagan turned his attention back to the business at hand and spent the rest of the half alternately knocking down and being knocked down by the minotaur. Brashfy Claw took an opportunity during the struggle to put a hoof to Hagan while he was down and, seeing the look still in Hagan's eyes, the referee pulled the goatman out of the game for his own protection. The ball, meanwhile, was knocked free of dwarven hands when the beastman Cra-tigor hurled himself into a flying cross body block to bowl over dwarf runner Duerrim. Neither Dunker nor Revenger made any headway with it before the half was called.
The second half started much the same but running in the other direction. The Chaos line went man-to-man, surprising and briefly scattering the dwarven line with their ferocity. Hagan Drek-Troll was unfazed and continued to bust heads, seemingly stunning a different Chaos player each turn. Beastman Thishgy Antler recovered the kickoff and attempted to find a hole in the melee by running up the same sideline against which the ball had been trapped in the first half with much the same result. After a few turns of back-and-forth struggling over the fallen ball, dwarf blocker Kazain saw an opening and went for it, only to bobble the pickup and knock the ball into the fans. After a brief scuffle, the ball was hurled back onto the field significantly closer to the dwarven scoring zone. Unfortunately, the churning of the midfield carnage left most of the Revengers in very poor position to attempt a recovery. Goatbro Cry-mulgors got control of the ball for a moment but was completely isolated from his team, and the dwarves predictably carried the ball into the endzone with pieces of him still clinging to it. The touchdown seemed to improve Hagan Drek-Troll's mood a bit, although his celebratory headbutt hospitalized Chaos lineman Slouk-mulgor.
The final drive began on turn 15, leaving Goatman's Revenge with very little chance of an answering point. The dwarven kick flew out of bounds, however, and the Chaos coach took the risky move of giving the touchback to unprotected lineman Tralow Tail. Tralow's teammates cleared him a path, however, and he made a wild dash for the endzone, landing a brutal hornbutt on the only dwarven defender in the backfield. Hagan Drek-Troll, lynchpin of the dwarven defense (and, indeed, entire team), gave desperate chase, but failed for the first time in the game to inflict any violence at all as the goatman eluded his grasp. Dhaos Fangepile, now sighted thanks to the intervention of a crowbar and a can opener but still quite wobbly, trundled after in an attempt to rescue his teammate, but he succeeded only in tripping, falling on his face, and distracting Tralow with his shouts. Unfortunately, the goatman's momentary hesitation saw the clock run out before he could make it to the endzone.
Hagan Drek-Troll threw one last gut shot in the final moment to punish Thishgy Antler for touching and thereby besmirching the ball, which he described as "a relic of dwarven history, you hooved arsehole". The beastman lay unconscious on the field until long after the dwarven team had been dispatched to the now-empty stands to look for the rest of Drok Dreng-Troll's arm.
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